entertaining – The Lady Hooper-Brackett

New Year’s Diss: Why Did They Leave at 12:01?

Ahh yes, the disappointment when guests hightail it after the big moment passes! Can you relate?

Dear Lady Hooper-Brackett,

I hosted our annual New Year’s party. My husband and I invited about 40 people to celebrate with us and we had the usual food and beverages available. It took a lot of work, preparation, and planning to get things set up. The party started at 7 PM and things seemed to be going well. All of the guests arrived by 830 and we had a lively time. At 1130 we started to watch the festivities in New York and anticipated the ball drop. After much to-do and the countdown and obligatory toast to the New Year…three quarters of my guests decided to leave. The time was 12:01AM! Barely a minute past midnight!!! I am quite offended but am not sure that I should be. My husband says that it was a long evening for everyone and some of our guests needed to work today, but I cannot help but feel that it is rude to up and leave so close to midnight. May I have your thoughts?

Ringing In The New Year With Aggravation

Dear Ringing,

I understand your pain. I also understand the pain of those who must work or those who a bit of age on them. My mother would often entertain on New Year’s (back in the Dark Ages known as the 80s) and would have a party much as you just described. As most of the people attending the party were older folks (by older I mean in their 70s and 80s) it was often the case that once the ball dropped, the champagne glasses were drained, and New Year kisses were shared, these people had their coats on and were headed for the door! My mother (indeed no one) ever complained because the family had spent an enjoyable evening in their company. I beg you not to feel offended. There was nothing ill-mannered in their behavior. In fact, why not begin the New Year by extending the benefit of the doubt and being happy that you were able to share the end of one year and the start of the next in good company.

Best New Year Wishes,

The Lady Hooper-Brackett

Guest’s Guide To Gift Giving

As a tie-in to the previous post about setting the table for entertaining guests, let’s look at the nice custom of guests bringing the hostess a small gift as a thank you for putting on a wonderful get-together.

The guest need not spend a fortune or spend an inordinate amount of time searching for the perfect gift. These types of gifts, in my opinion, should be simple and useful.

Some items you may wish to consider when choosing a gift for your host:

A bottle of wine

A box of chocolates

A bouquet of flowers

Some lovely cocktail napkins

A box of pretty stationery

Non-perishable foodstuffs (jams, jellies, mustards etc..) in a gift box or set.

A beautiful coffee table book (I prefer photography or travel books)

Marble cheese cutter

If your host is an avid barbecuer, an apron or BBQ tool set

I’m fond of getting good deals on beautiful things so I suggest finding a sale at one of the better department stores on some of the items on the list and stocking upon these items to grab and go when you are asked over. I’ve found appropriate items that any host would be proud to display at Dillard’s and even TJ Maxx!

Best Guest Gift Wishes,

The Lady Hooper-Brackett

Hostess Hint: Setting The Table For Guests

I spoke to a group of my friends about planning ahead for entertaining. One easy way to take some stress off is to set the table ahead of time. Years ago a kind older lady gave me this tip and I have used it each time I’ve had guests.

Set your complete table the day before you will be entertaining. Lay out your serving dishes on the sideboard, also. Take new and clean clear shower curtains or other clear plastic sheeting and lay it over the settings and dishes. Keeps dirt and dust off and then you merely remove right before the guests arrive.

Incidentally, if you have eager young table setters, a cute way to have them remember where the silverware is to be placed on the table is thus:

Spoon and Knife….5 letters same as RIGHT

Fork…4 letters same as LEFT.

I hope that the youth of the world will be interested in good table settings. It is a nicety that we should all revisit in the civilized world.

Best Table Wishes,

The Lady Hooper-Brackett

Guest Towels in the Bathroom: Are They Off Limits?

It is always an adventure to settle down with my cup of coffee in the morning and read through my emails to see what is concerning my darling friends. I came across this interesting problem regarding towels.

My friend went to a First Communion party at her niece’s house and when she used the bathroom facilities, was dumbstruck that her niece had only provided a small hand towel for the fifty or so guests that she had in her home. Her shock did not come from the fact that there was only one towel, however. The shock came from seeing others using the facilities and then discovering that the towel was perfectly dry…it had not been used! She found wet spots near the sink and the soap was wet, so hands seemed to be washed…so why not use the towel?

I can recall a time in my childhood when I was admonished by my dear mother to not use the ‘guest towels’ that were specially hung on a bar near the sink. So, I never used them. She had elevated them to sacred status in my impressionable mind. For years, even when using the facilities in other’s homes, I avoided touching the guest towels and wiped my hands on my pants! (Yes, I know…the horror of it!!!)

I believe that there can be a solution to this problem, however.

Provide enough small washcloths for a couple of dozen to use. A beautiful stack right next to the sink. As the host, you use the first one…crumple it up, place it in a basket near the sink, and hope that this subtle message tells other guests…it is OK to use the towels!
Get a festive box of disposable paper towels and leave them near the sink. Perhaps guests do not want to feel that they are creating more laundry for the host, but will feel free to use paper towels.
Leave no towel in the guest bath at all, after all no one is using it anyway. Watch as people leave the bathroom. You take a drink for every person who comes out with wipe marks on their pants (kidding!)

Best Clean Hand Wishes,

The Lady Hooper-Brackett

The Impeccable Host: Entertaining With Grace

Many of my friends can be stressed by entertaining, but it is really a simple thing if you want to be known as being the host with flair and grace.

The Host(ess) with the Most(est) According to the Lady Hooper-Brackett

Your smiling face should be the first thing that a guest sees when they enter your home. Greet everyone warmly and promptly.

Have a serving table nearby where arrivals can take a prefilled cocktail or glass of wine and a little morsel to eat.

Be prepared if someone hands you a hostess gift. Decorate a small table and use it for the purpose of placing the gifts.

Take coats and wraps from your guests, place them in a closet or in the bedroom. At no times should a pile of coats be visible to arriving guests.

Be sure to introduce those who are arriving to those guests who are already there and make sure that all guests are making conversation and enjoying themselves. It is also your responsibility to diffuse hot topics and turn them to acceptable topics. See my earlier post on DANGER Topics.

Keep an eye on the refreshments, making sure there is enough out for everyone.

If you are serving a seated meal with several courses, place cards are a wonderful touch.

Relax and enjoy the evening! Remember you set the tone for your guests.

It is my hope that you will be the ultimate example of graciousness and ease when you welcome your own cherished friends to your abode.

Best Hostess Wishes,

The Lady Hooper-Brackett