Manners Monday: Photographic Stress in The Family Shrine

Cherished readers, recently a dear friend came to The Lady for advice on a sticky subject of family photographs. She is an older lady with three children and several grandchildren. Her problem was that two of her children have children with their former spouses, but are now re-married. The bone of contention is this: Her new daughters-in-law both resent the fact that she has family photographs on the wall that still clearly display the old spouse. The Lady’s friend insists that it is her house and that the former spouses will always be the mothers of her grandchildren, so why shouldn’t she display their pictures?

The Lady offered this advice:

Yes, while it is true that one can display any and all pictures that one wishes in their home, The Lady feels that others’ feelings must be considered. The display of pictures of ex-in-laws can certainly send the message that the new spouse is not welcome or taken very seriously by the family and The Lady assumes that her friend is intelligent enough to know that this can cause strife in a marriage. (Do you really want to add another stress to your adult child’s life? It’s hard enough as it is without this petty problem) This advice applies to everyone: Regardless of how you feel about your child’s ex, when they have moved on to a serious relationship, support them and this includes taking down old pictures of the ex. It will go a long way to creating harmony in the family.

Best Framed Wishes,

The Lady Hooper-Brackett

Tuesday Tea-Time Thoughts: Basic Manners for Children

Cherished readers, it is Tuesday once again and since we had some very nice weather here, The Lady and her friends were able to take tea in a lovely breezy and shady spot. Today the topic of conversation around our hyacinth-laden table was Children’s Manners. While some of The Lady’s friends felt that children (and people in general) have gotten much ruder lately, the general consensus is that the wee little ones take well to manners and etiquette if you teach them early. The Lady has compiled a list of basic manners that she feels all children over the age of five can practice:

-to say hello pleasantly to people they meet and to look people in the eye when speaking

-to speak when spoken to

-to get along with their siblings, cousins, and other children

-to show respect for older people

-to say “Thank you”, “Please,” “I’m sorry”, “Excuse me”

-to not interrupt others while they are speaking

-to remember the basic etiquette rule of never calling attention to oneself and to not raise merry hell, scream, or otherwise cavort in public.

-to shake hands

-to respect the property of others and not touch or play with other people’s things unless invited to do so

-to respect the privacy of others

These are the basic building blocks of etiquette that every  child needs. More instruction in this fine art and we can change the world!

Best Etiquette Wishes,

The Lady Hooper-Brackett